Who Cheats The Most In A Relationship? Men or Women
Why do we have to know who cheats most in a relationship? Perhaps, to save the marriage after learning why they cheat. A better communication is the key to shoring up a marriage.
A man may realize the negative impact on his wife, family and himself, but still continue an affair. How? “It’s all in the perception of the cheater,” says Orlando. “If he feels unwanted, undervalued and taken for granted, his personal needs of being wanted, valued and appreciated will win out.”
Realize this: If your husband is unfaithful, it’s not your fault, no matter what people say. “When a man cheats, he’s making a conscious choice to do it,” says Dr. Brosh. “The idea of being pushed into the arms of another woman is an expression, not a reality.” Orlando echoes this sentiment: “Men don’t cheat because of who she is; they cheat because of who they’re not,” he says. “The ‘fault’ is that the signs of disconnection have been ignored by both parties.”
WHY MEN CHEAT?
Does husband cheat because he is unhappy with his wife? Not necessarily. According to a Rutgers University study, 56% of men who have affairs claim to be happy in their marriages. They’re largely satisfied with all they have and aren’t looking for a way out, yet they still find themselves in bed with other women—and in hot water with their wives.
Honestly, being in a relationship might increase a man’s options considering there are a certain group of women that like to go after committed men. It is obviously not enough to stop people from cheating. Love is an emotion that might keep you in a relationship, but it’s logic that keeps you from straying, especially when you believe you won’t get caught. Men are as faithful as their options. It doesn’t mean that when a man truly love a person he would never cheat on her.
Most unfaithful men aren’t seeking out an additional relationship. Unfaithful men are generally only seeking to satisfy physical needs and not to replace or give up the relationship they already have. Only few men who are looking for satisfaction something that the’re not getting at home– usually something ego based – but even these men are rarely looking to leave the woman they’re with. 9 out of 10 cases, men aren’t looking to replace their women they have this is due to the fact that if they’re already in a relationship, first, it’s difficult to get to know another woman beyond the physical; secondly, the woman he is already with has a head start because he’s familiar with her in his life; and last, the only thing more amazing than how long some women will stay with an unfaithful man is how long a side-woman is willing to remain in the side-woman role. He will only leave the woman he already with if he meets another woman that clearly supersedes her.
Will a man continue to cheat if a woman takes him back?
A difficult to answer but the short answer is, “yes.” Although a new relationship is exciting, “an affair can rekindle the marriage,” says Charles J. Orlando, author of The Problem with Women…Is Men. “Men realize who they want for the rest of their lives and that the new relationship isn’t as perfect as they thought.” If a man will continue to cheat for as long as he is a cheater at heart even if she does everything right, it is up to the man to be willing to change. Flings can highlight how little self-control someone has that it’s possible to get back on track.
WHY WOMEN CHEAT?
An Indiana University study shows that men and women cheat at the same rate. But “the reasons the sexes cheat are different,” says Orlando. He explains women are more likely to cheat for emotional satisfaction. “Online cheating—without any physical contact—is the most damaging type of infidelity,” says Orlando. Becoming emotionally invested in another person means you’ve likely checked out of your marriage. But if it’s just sex, it’s less about attachment and more about a hurtful mistake.
Recently, several books and articles have attempted to explain why women are now cheating as much as men. However, very important pieces to this extremely complicated puzzle continue to be left out. The reason is twofold: some who write and speak about this subject haven’t done enough research, so consequently they simply regurgitate old, outdated information that has little to do with the real reasons women cheat; others obviously want to avoid controversy and are afraid to disclose certain key pieces of information because the truth is so contrary to our current beliefs. Unfortunately, without these missing pieces, it’s impossible to understand, and to subsequently fix, the real problem occurring in relationships today.
Some women after their long years of happy marriage, they began feeling bored and unhappy. Perhaps the unhappiness is attributed to the way they were feeling to their partners and began to view them as the culprit too. In fact, women are the most likely to divorce in their late twenties and thirties after an average of 4 years of marriage. During this time, it’s quite common for women to experience a pre-midlife crisis, which is similar to the male midlife crisis, only with an important difference – a difference that can actually make women more likely to cheat than men.
HOW DO WOMEN REACT TO CHEATING?
How could Tiger Woods’s ex, Elin Nordegren, and Arnold Schwarzenegger’s ex, Maria Shriver, not have known what their high-profile husbands were up to? They probably did, but couldn’t bear to acknowledge it. “At one level, I knew, but my denial was so strong,” says Lily* from Toronto, Canada. “The pain, had I accepted it at that time, would have been too horrendous, so I had to process it slowly.” According to Dr. Brosh, the jilted celebrities were likely doing the same thing: choosing what they could live with for the sake of their kids or to avoid humiliation and the fallout.
HOW DO MEN REACT TO CHEATING?
Men can forgive themselves for their indiscretions, but find it much harder to forgive their partners for the same,’ says therapist Phillip Hodson, Fellow of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy. Her unfaithfulness impacted on his feelings of masculinity and self-worth.
According to Paula Hall, a relationship counselor with Relate, ‘There is definitely more evidence that men are more likely to see their partner having an affair as signalling the end of a relationship.’
She adds: ‘For men, the sexual component of their wife’s affair is very important. Women are much more likely to ask: “Did you love her?”
‘The feelings and the emotional connection are more likely to be seen as a threat to a woman. Men are more concerned about the sexual aspect.’